Goals Follow Up

So last April I began this mentoring journey. It’s been almost a year. I thought it would be a good time to check in and see where I am with the goals I set in at the beginning of the six month mentoring program.

Here were my goals:

1. Determine my next step career wise
2. Establish a long term career path and associated goals
3. Boost my self-confidence
4. Project a more professional, positive image
5. Improve my weak EQ areas of self-regulation and emotionalism
6. Find a good balance between work and family

Before I give an update on my goals let me say that within the first few weeks my job changed to the point where my goals had to instantly change. This was a good thing because I was promoted to the job I wanted, but at the same time the need to get up to speed in this new role outweighed the need to work on my specific goals. Since my mentor had the job I suddenly found myself in, my mentor was an invaluable resource and became my go to person for just about everything. With that some of the goals still got accomplished. Here’s an update on my progress:

1. It was interesting in that when we talked about next steps career wise, my mentor always had the attitude of why wait. If that is what you want to be doing why not do it now?  Sometimes we need to hear the simple answers. I don’t know that we really nailed this one down because I am not sure what is next for me. For the moment I am satisfied and am focusing on being the best I can be in all my roles at work, as a spouse, and as a parent.
2. Again I’m not at a point where I know what I want to do next. There are so many different paths but at the moment I am content where I am.
3. EQmentor helped boost my self-confidence tremendously. Even the people I work with noticed this change and commented about it.
4. Again the boost in self confidence and projecting a more professional, positive image go hand in hand. These were the biggest benefits I received from EQmentor and are what I needed to boost my career.
5. It was interesting that this was my mentor’s weakest area as well and I could see from my mentors posts on the discussion area that my mentor struggled in this area as well. I don’t feel that my mentor directly helped me in this area. It was more that by me being aware of this problem I was able to tame the outward projection of this problem. There were occasions though where my mentor told me that a certain thing might be better not said and in general my mentor was right.
6. We never had a chance to work on this and I am still struggling with this.

My Final Scores

So six months ago I took an inital EQ assessment. You can read about the results here.

About a month ago I took the final assessment. I received my scores a few days later. My results are what I expected. I did not make huge changes in any of the EQ areas. As you can see with the exception of self-regulation, my scores are already above average in all the other areas.

The changes are all one to two point changes which to me seems pretty insignificant. If any of my friends are reading this I’d be curious to hear your thoughts. Feel free to comment.

Wrapping Up

Last week my 6-month subscription with EQ mentor ended. As one of my final tasks I took an EQ test — which I believe was the same test I took at the beginning of this journey. As soon as I have the results I will share those with you as well as some final thoughts about the process.

The Final Round

So I am beginning the final month with EQmentor. My mentor and I have both been so busy the past few weeks it’s been hard to stay on top of things.

I will say that I appreciate the fact that my mentor treats me as an adult and not a student and realizes that I have a job and responsibilities. My mentor never overloads me with busy work. Every assignment I’ve received is more of a suggestion and has been completely relevant to what is going on in my work or personal life.

There is a plethora of resources on the EQmentor Web site once you are logged in. There are worksheets for each EQ area that you can work through on your own or with your mentor. The worksheets are indexed by title and by EQ area so you can easily find ones that relate to the area you want to improve.

As I’ve said before though, the most useful thing for me has been having a mentor who works in the position I was promoted to at the beginning of my EQmentor journey. Most of our discussions have gone beyond what is contained on the worksheets and are more directly related to my job.

This last month with consist of a lot of wrap up and planning for the future beyond my time with my mentor when I am on my own.

Month 5

I can’t believe Month 5 is here already. What a whirlwind. Since beginning the EQmentor program my job has changed so much and my responsibilities have increased as well. While this is a wonderful thing, it has made it challenging for me to keep up with my mentoring journey.

My mentor has been on top of me about this and we have had some great discussions about time management and work-life-family balance.

Initially when we began our mentoring relationship we were really focused on improving my weak EQ areas – self regulation and social skills. I have been lucky enough to have a mentor who has the same job I have been promoted to. The focus of our interactions recently has been more on how to handle some of the new challenges I face in my job. For instance I had to create a strategic plan. Having never done this I didn’t even know where to start. My mentor sent me the framework of his or her strategic plan and I used this to get started with my own plan.

I am so happy that I was matched with a mentor in my field. This has been like having a personal guru to guide me along in my new role.

Chat

One of the fun ways to interact on EQmentor is through scheduled chats. I’ve been to several over the past few months. Topics that I’ve attended have been communication, time management, gender and equality in the workplace.

The great thing about the scheduled chats is that you get to see point of views from multiple mentors and mentees. It’s a great way to learn and share. You can also save a transcript of the chat and refer back to it later.

Monday…Beginning Month 4

It’s Monday. It’s August and I am beginning month 4.

I has a scheduled IM/chat with my mentor today to gain focus on work and life and try to get back on track. When you get as overwhelmed and side tracked as I have been the chat sessions are a godsend.

In fact as one point when asked by my mentor what are the top three priorities right now, I rambled on about something. My mentor stopped me and asked if this is seriously what is keeping me awake at night. I was annoyed at first and my feelings were hurt. In reflection it was a valid point.

So I have just completed my third month and have three more months to go with EQmentor. I’m at the half way point.

I do feel that I’ve come a long way so far. I also can see where I want to be.

One thing that I would be curious to find out is the effect that personal growth has on existing relationships–like marriages. I think I’ll pose that question in the EQ Village.

What is a mentor?

One of the interesting things about going through the EQmentor program is that I am seeing mentors everywhere now and often in unexpected ways and places.

I have quite a few informal mentors. Each of these people has different skills, knowledge, and abilities. The key is knowing who to go to and when.

For instance I have one friend/colleague who I can go to any time I have a problem where I’m just not sure what to do and where to start from. Another friend/colleague is always there when I need someone to vent to or just to listen. Yet another friend/colleague is well versed in how to get people to say yes.

Notice I refer to each of these people as friends as well as colleagues. This wasn’t always the case. I have been burned in the past by friends on the job, but I have found through our professional/work/mentoring relationship a friendship has developed. I’ve come to realize that this is not a bad thing. We spend nearly 1/3 of our lives at work so doesn’t it make sense to carefully establish some friendships.

Ironically I bet none of these people realizes that they are acting in a mentoring capacity. In fact if you look at the traditional mentoring definition these relationships may not even qualify.

Dictionary.com defines a mentor as:

1. a wise and trusted counselor or teacher
2. an influential senior sponsor or supporter

EQmentor is redefining mentoring as a process and not an outcome–”to get knowledge to those who need it so that they can make better decisions. With this definition, we should be open to multiple sources of knowledge.”

So who is your mentor? Where do you go to find out the things you need to know? Who or what is your source of information?

I’ve been promoted!

This morning I met with my boss who offered me a promotion. I can’t believe it. Although I don’t know why I can’t believe it. I’ve so totally earned this and worked so hard. My role will be similar to what I do now except that I will be responsible for the whole area that I work in and coaching and mentoring about 50 employees.

So this is wonderful news as I will have more responsibility and greater influence to impact my organization in a positive way.

For now my title will not change, but hey it’s all about the work we do not what we are called.

Tomorrow we are having another meeting and I am considering asking for a small salary increase. It’s hard working for a non-profit–you almost feel guilty. But I also know I could go to the private sector and make close to double what I am paid now. I know it’s not all about money but it would be nice to be compensated fairly. I think that shows value and faith in employees.

You know I owe a debt of gratitude to EQmentor and my mentor. The past few months I have become a totally different person. If I had not been going through this process to improve my EQ skills I’m not sure that things would have turned out this way.

So thank you EQmentor and my mentor (whoever you are). It’s been awesome to have him or her to discuss all these issues with and to bounce ideas off of. My mentor has helped guide me through this entire process, and since he or she is from outside my organization the mentor brings a fresh perspective to things.

I am so glad I have made this investment in myself. I have to say there is work involved. Your mentor will not think for you, but rather guide you in the right direction. Learning…that’s what it’s all about.

EQ Chat

One of the cool things offered by EQmentor is scheduled chat sessions. Again it is all anonymous, but the sessions are open to all mentors and mentees. The chats last an hour, take place in the evening, and are facilitated by a mentor (though other mentors join in). The topics vary but relate to EQ or business issues such as: communication skills, women as leaders, managing a multi-generational workforce, succession planning, innovation in organizations.

The sessions are always lively and it helps to be a fast typer and reader. It’s great to connect with a group of people all at the same time going through the same experience and discuss relevant topics. Each person brings his or her own ideas and experiences to the session so there is always a lot to learn.

The facilitating mentors do a good job of keeping everyone on topic and really questioning you so that you think deeper. For instance during a session about innovation I went in thinking that I am already an expert at that. But the facilitator saw that and pushed me to think and analyze a little further.